Peace on earth: "Let it begin with me"

The old hymn, "Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me" seems a perfect one to consider as the events in Tucson, Arizona last week unfold in greater detail over the attempted killing of Gabrielle Giffords and others.

Politicians and pundits talk of "toning down the rhetoric" and "civility" and "coming together as a nation." Haven't we heard all this following every tragedy in the last hundred years?

And yet every election, we see most politicians using smear tactics in their ads that seem to get only bolder. We hear of children being bullied (some suiciding) in schools that turn a deaf ear to pleas for help from the targets. We witness rudeness by others (sometimes by ourselves) with little regard for the impact that words and actions may have.

Civility is the responsibility of each one of us. We aim for this in every mediation...that disputants may speak their minds respectfully even when emotions run high.

Why is being civil so hard? Because we put ourselves first. People used to wave a hand to gesture a thank you when a driver would let them out of a gas station into traffic. I don't see that so often any more. Shoppers in grocery lines are in such a rush that they don't always notice the person behind them with only a few items compared to their cartful. We used to invite them to step in front of us. Malls are often scenes of drivers racing to get the closest spot, sometimes even leading to violence.

These and hundreds of other examples of daily incivility remind me that peace on earth doesn't just happen. It's not just for the lawmakers. It begins with me.